Annette Ketner, author of Lunch with My Husband’s Lover. Winner in the 2020 San Diego Memoir Showcase. Interview by Laura Engel, SDMWA Board President
LE: Congratulations, Annette! In a nutshell—tell us about your winning memoir piece for the 6th Annual San Diego Memoir Showcase.
AK: The piece I wrote to the theme (That’s a Terrible Idea. What Time?) reflects the time my husband’s girlfriend called me out of the blue and wanted to meet me for lunch to talk about their relationship. Surprising even myself, I agreed to that and ended up learning a whole lot more than I anticipated.
LE: What has been your experience taking classes/workshops and writing memoir in San Diego?
AK: I have found San Diego Writers, Ink, and the San Diego Memoir Writers Association classes to be excellent: motivating, inspiring, and just a lot of fun. I have learned something helpful every time, learned to appreciate other styles and points of view, and maybe the best outcome has been linking up with other writers and teachers of like mind who have become good supportive friends along the way.
LE: This year has been unsettling in so many ways. How do you think that has affected your writing?
AK: Actually, this crazy year has had a positive impact on my writing for at least two reasons. First, I have more time to write since working from home eliminates travel time and provides easy access for lunchtime writing as well. And having to stay home has eliminated many random episodes of wasted time. Secondly, writing has been an amazing source of distraction and escape from all the disturbing political, health, and climate issues of 2020. Sitting down to write about a time when these things were not present, and the concerns that were part of that time were not so serious, has really made writing inviting and healing. For a while, it takes me away from all the current craziness.
LE: What are you excited about when it comes to participating in the 6th Annual Memoir Showcase?
AK: My writing has been for my work or my own personal enjoyment all my life, shared only with a few friends and family. To have it now being shared with a broader audience of viewers that I don’t even know is pretty exciting. It makes you feel that maybe you have written something of value to other people beyond your circle. And I have to say, having my piece chosen out of those of the hundreds of great local writers who entered the contest is a very validating and joyful experience. I was blown away!
LE: What advice would you give new memoir writers?
AK: Being a new memoir writer myself, the only advice I can offer is 1) get involved with a writing group—it keeps you motivated; 2) take classes with a good writing coach—you’ll learn what works and what doesn’t; 3) keep writing—you won’t love everything you write, but you’ll get better as you keep at it. And 4) enjoy your gift—your life story is unique, and writing about it makes you appreciate your journey for what it was.
LE: Thank you so much, Annette. We are all looking forward to watching your scene “Lunch with My Husband’s Lover,” performed on Dec. 5 at 7 p.m. at the San Diego Memoir Showcase!